"Know Thyself"

"Know thyself"

A Delphic Maxim from Ancient Greece. A truth thousands of years old yet still valid; a fact which may seem strange in this modern world of multiple and metamorphosing truths where tomorrow's lie is today's truth and vice versa, or in some cases the truth merely becomes an unconfirmed rumor, one of many millions that throng the 'news' channels of today. Though to be fair, I am comparing a philosophical (perhaps psychological, too) truth to the truths of the news that we see today and being from different fields perhaps comparing the two would be as fair as comparing an aircraft with a bike, or a pile of poop as would be apt for some 'news' agencies.

The context, usage and factors that influence vary a lot. 

Ranting apart: Know thyself, this little truth is oft repeated in the simple everyday philosophies espoused by others, be it people of a particular school of thought or self help authors or philosopher-authors like Paulo Cohelo (of this last last mention I am a bit unsure, though a reading of one of his books leads me to believe he may in truth espouse all I say he may espouse). People preach "love yourself", but to do so you must know well and truly who you are, and what you are to love oneself truly rather than in the narcissistic manner that one comes across so often in others, even the traitorous self to some extent. 

And yet, despite this popular knowledge, acceptance and demand people find it tough to do so. It's as though we have a mental block in our heads, not unlike the DMRC Diversion signs found so commonly in Delhi just a few years back (and even presently if you traverse certain areas of the national capital), that says "Nope. No way you want to go down there buster. Why not rather think of that awesome book you read, or that show you watched, or perhaps drool a little and relive that ice cream binge in your head?" If you somehow make it past these blockades and begin to actually analyse yourself, collecting tidbits of information contained in scraps of memory and echoes of long forgotten incidents, events momentous and mundane now lost in the dusty old annals of ancient history, sooner or later the Trojan Horse will turn up.

What is this Trojan Horse? Well, it is the severe self-criticism of your actions that hides behind the benign mask of going over past mistakes to understand and prevent a recap in the future. "Oh, a helpful dose of self-analysis" you go and let it in and when you turn away to return to your job at the forensics lab of old deeds and memories the horse opens up and out comes the treacherous worm.

"Self-analysis huh?", it goes (I guess) "Well, how about this treasure trove of stupid things you did and shouldn't even forgive yourself for? Here, go beat yourself over the head with all this"

After which, mission accomplished, it promptly vanishes lest some eager gardener, caretaker of the mind's twisted little green patch of floral delights, come over to whack it over the head and 'vanish' it for good.

Those who make it past the first stage oft falter at this second one and it takes a tremendous will of effort to do so. For some twisted reason our 'hearts' find it easier to forgive others than it does itself (and a real interesting piece somewhat related to this can be found at the blog of a rather outspoken and talented (and also quite delightful) lady by the name of Minal- http://rainbowsandrape.blogspot.in/2014/01/2014.html)*.

Does it derive from some inherent fault in our 'Emotional Mind', is it related to self-esteem issues, or is it something else altogether? I know not. What I do know is that it can be fought and that only when you crush that wicked little worm that'd have you ranting against yourself will you be able to know yourself truly, accept yourself, and perhaps change yourself for the better, thus attaining that little modicum of peace we so covet.

I myself have oft tried and have as frequently failed to make it past one or the other. Though sometimes I do take a few steps away from that serpentine menace and gain a little more insight, but the modicum of peace I mentioned above? It still eludes me. 

Don't let it elude you.


*EDIT: The lady in question has long since deactivated her original blog. To those who have but recently read this piece: I am sorry but I'm afraid that piece is no longer accessible to us denizens of the World Wide Web.